Life Since Then, Part 1

Wow… my last blog was March 8^th. I need to get back in the grove of things, but it just seems that now there is simply not enough hours in the day to get what I need done… let alone anything extra that I WANT to do.

So much has happened since then...

Two days after posting my last blog, I got news that a girl that was once a childhood best friend had passed away unexpectedly. Her and I had a massive falling out when I moved in with my dad during my freshman year of high school but we had been back in touch for almost a year up to that point and were in the process of mending our relationship. My sister texted me saying she saw something about it on facebook and wanted me to hear it from her before I found out online. It wasn’t something that anyone saw coming. She was always so upbeat and involved with nearly everything at her college. She had a way about her where nearly everyone that met her instantly liked her. Her energy and laughter was contagious and there was never a dull moment when she was involved. But the best thing about her was how she loved to help people. Any time anyone needed anything, Amber was the first one there offering her help… no questions asked. This news prompted an unexpected and bittersweet trip to WV. I got to see so many people that I hadn’t seen in many, many years which sparked renewed friendships. I will forever be grateful for Amber and how she’s affected my life both directly and indirectly.

The most pressing and time consuming thing was waiting on Trevor (yes, the ultrasound showed the baby was going to be a boy) to get here and all the prepping that was involved. We had to build rooms downstairs to make room for the baby which I believe I mentioned in my last blog – a bedroom for Timothy and an office for me. We finally got the rooms finished by the mid July after starting in January followed by several months of almost constant setbacks. Ok, not really setbacks, but just various other things that took precedence.

Brian coached Thomas’s baseball team again and I helped him with that. I was lucky that baseball season fell within my second trimester… the massive energy drain of my first trimester was killer. As the season got towards the end, I really relied on the help of some of the players or other coaches to help get gear on kids or really anything that involved bending over. At the same time, Timothy was also playing baseball but on a different team for a different league. So once again, we were juggling the boys needing to be in two different places which meant that some of it was at the same time. It felt like Brian and I were almost constantly going in separate directions. I think the hardest thing to accomplish at that time was to just have some time to ourselves as a couple… not as parents or as tired, worn out people… but to really enjoy time together alone.

And I should mention… sometime during the summer (I don’t remember when), I managed to drive the tractor through our garage. I had driven the trash down to the end of the driveway – in flip flops. On my way back, I was turning the tractor so I could park it next to the house and my flip flop got stuck under the gas pedal and the corner of the bucket hit the house. After several choice expletives, I got off and looked at where it had connected. Timothy came over to me and his first words were “yea, you should call Dad.” I called Brian and the following conversation took place:
Me: Hey, where are you?
Him: I’m almost home… stuck in New Carlisle behind a truck that sprays paint lines on the road.
Me: Ok. Well, before I tell you this, I just want you to know that I love you very much.
Him: Did you hit the car with the tractor? (He knew I was taking the trash down.)
Me: No, just the house.
Him: No you didn’t.
Me: Yea… I did.
Him: How bad is it?
Me: There’s a hole. Like, I can stick my hand through it.
*click*
*ring, ring*
Me: Yea? (crying)
Him: I’m sorry I hung up. I’ll be home in a few and look at it.
Me: Ok, love you.
Him: Love you too.
Brian pulled into the driveway and didn’t park there… he pulled to the side of the house. I was outside walking around it – still crying. I had ran the edge of the bucket completely through the wall and had pushed the side door off of the supports. Crap. Thankfully, I married a man that knows how to fix my screw-ups. He managed to have it fixed the next day. I’ve only been on the tractor a handful of times since.

We ended up taking a weekend trip to WV in July after baseball season ended to see some of my family and friends. We hadn’t been out of town alone (not around here “out of town” but I mean on some kind of vacation) since our honeymoon in 2011. It was only two days, but we were well overdue for some time away together. But it was the relaxation I needed to get myself in gear to have Trevor’s room ready before he got here.

Two weekends later, “baby frenzy” started with my shower at Sugar Isle Golf Course in New Carlisle. I was so thankful for my friends and family that was able to make it… even if they couldn’t stay long, their presence meant a lot to me. I was especially thankful for my Dad and two of my brothers that stayed and helped with anything and everything that they were asked to. I honestly don’t think I’ve ever seen my Dad so excited… at least, not up until that point.

The next weekend was Brian’s family reunion that we always host at our house. It was an incredible day… not too hot and didn’t rain. His family is always incredibly helpful while here and their help made the day go so much smoother… something to be really grateful for while 8 months pregnant. I believe the total number of people that came was 62. Down from the 74 from last year, but still an awesome turnout!

To be continued... Trevor's birth is next!

Update, Part 3

...... Continued from Part 2....

So now that we’re expecting a little one, we have to expand our living area in the house. We have a partially finished basement that we are now in the process of building a bedroom for Timothy and a small office for me for when I eventually come back home to work. After those rooms are complete, we also plan on putting a bathroom in down there also. That one will be the most labor intensive and the most expensive I think, but I would prefer to have it done before the baby gets here so there’s not construction going on in the house with a newborn here also.

Then on January 12, I did something that I didn’t think I would do at all. I had texted my brother to let him know about the baby and he basically convinced me to tell our mother. Honestly, I hadn’t planned on telling her. I figured it would eventually get around to her. But, I caught a lot of crap from various people about how I didn’t reach out to her to tell her I had got married and I figured that it would make me the bigger person to at least let her know. So I sent her a message on Facebook. I don’t have her current address or a phone number, so that was pretty much the only way to do it. The message was pretty straightforward and to the point… I told her that I figured the news should come from me and events that led up to finding out we’re pregnant. (A very condensed version of the above story...) I wasn’t shocked when there wasn’t an immediate reply… I wasn’t sure if there would be a reply at all. But, on January 14, she responded. It was pretty long response… one that I had to pull up on the computer to read it all because it wouldn’t all load on the app on my phone. But, just because it was longer than I had anticipated, doesn’t mean the content was over par. She told me about my birth and the events leading up to it, which was nice because I know now what I can possibly expect. But the ending really bothered me. It said that she wishes me the best with our new addition and that she hopes I enjoy this experience as much as she enjoyed being my mommy. “The baby that you were… the woman you have become… I will always love you.” It caught me off guard at first, but the more I thought about it, the more it got to me. It’s been EIGHT YEARS since we’ve talked and she has the nerve to say “I’ll always love you” like that makes up for it? I don’t think so. But, it wasn’t an invitation for her to come back into my life… I have enough to deal with without the added drama. Maybe she knew that though? But that’s beside the point… I did what I needed to do.

We went to the doctor’s office on February 11 for our first baby appointment and got to start all the super fun testing (PLEASE read “super fun” with sarcasm… as MUCH sarcasm as possible…). The doctor told me that since I was only 10 weeks along that it was most likely we wouldn’t get to hear a heartbeat so he didn’t want me to get my hopes up. But… he was able to find a heartbeat! Not a faint one either… it was good and strong. Hearing that really relieved a lot of the worry that I had such as wondering if there was really a baby in there and if all three of those tests could have POSSIBLY been wrong. I’m pretty sure I didn’t stop smiling the rest of the day. The doctor ordered my standard prenatal blood work. If I’ve never mentioned before… I HATE needles… With a passion. To the point where I passed out after getting my ears pierced, almost passed out when my navel was pierced, and would have to be laid down when getting my birth control shot a few years ago. Brian was really great about it though… he left work early so he could drive me to get the blood drawn.

Shortly after, February 14, was our two year anniversary. It fell on a Thursday – skate night for the kids. Brian showed up at the skating rink with flowers and two balloons. He was very excited that I was the only one there with gifts. Seeing as we’re preparing for the baby, I was really glad he didn’t go out and get me something expensive again.

Fast forward to last night and we are far enough on the rooms where the first piece of drywall went up. Brian has surprised me a lot with how fast he’s putting up the materials. Between the bedroom, walk in closet, and office, the space taken up is about 270 sq ft. We had anticipated it taking up a lot more of the basement than it did, but now that the framing and insulation is done, it shows that there’s plenty of room left.

I am now officially in my 2^nd trimester! I have definitely felt like I’ve had more energy… and by more energy, I mean, I’m not crashing as soon as I walk in the door from work but I’m still exhausted before bedtime. I haven’t had near as much nausea, but I’ve also learned when I need to eat so it will control the nausea.

My second baby appointment is this coming Tuesday… no blood work this time, thank heavens. From what I understand, they’ll just do more measurements, discuss my blood work results, and listen for a heartbeat again. Brian won’t be able to make it to this appointment, so my Mom will be going with me. I’ll be 14 weeks at this appointment and they won’t do an ultrasound until 20 weeks, so hopefully I’ll at least be able to get it scheduled. Can’t wait to find out what sex Peanut is!

Update, Part 2

... Continued from Part 1 ...

Then came the REALLY BIG NEWS. I’ll start from the beginning of this one because it really starts before Christmas. (If you’re a guy, this may be TMI, but you’ll get through it just fine.) I had my yearly woman’s doctor appointment scheduled for December 6^th. And this was a big deal because I hadn’t been to one in a few years, even though I knew I needed to. But, low and behold, Aunt Flo hadn’t completely finished her visit the day of my appointment (NOT going to the doctor like that…) so I rescheduled. The new appointment was for January 14^th because their office was completely booked until then. I figured it would also give me those few extra days so I could make sure Aunt Flo’s January visit was completely over and done with. I kept waiting and waiting and waiting some more, but she didn’t show up on time. That’s not entirely unusual for me. She hasn’t been on schedule since I quit taking birth control… almost 5 years ago. But while I was waiting, there were some really weird things happening to me. I had these incredibly sharp cramps… not all over cramps, but ones in a certain area (not usually in the same place twice) and would quite literally take my breath away. This really didn’t alarm me too much because I normally cramped for 2-3 days before Aunt Flo would make herself known. But these cramps went on for about 2 weeks. There was one day where I was making apple juice flavored crystal light… normally I love apple juice. But the smell of it completely repulsed me to the point where I had to leave the kitchen. I was also extra tired… but I didn’t really get a lot of sleep to begin with so I chalked it up to just needing a day to rest. My “girls” were also incredibly sore… which, again, wasn’t unusual for before Aunt Flo’s visit. I’ve had times where Flo was incredibly late… she had been a week and a half late once and 2 weeks late another time, so I figured I would wait until then to really start to be concerned. However, I didn’t have that much time. Brian and I had agreed that I would wait to take a test on the Friday (January 11^th) morning before my Monday appointment. I figured the outcome from that could potentially change the nature of that appointment. But I have a very impatient husband apparently and he insisted that I take a test the night before I was supposed to. We got home from wrestling practice and I went to the bathroom and took it pretty much immediately. It came up positive. But of course one test wasn’t enough… so we went to town again that night and picked up some more from CVS. The entire time, Brian kept saying “drink more water, drink more water!” But the water didn’t work very quickly, so it took me about 45 minutes to have to go again. That one came up positive too. Mind you, we hadn’t been taking any precautions for a year and a half. I had pretty much given up on it happening and at this point, I was convinced my eyes were only seeing what I wanted to see.

I got to work the next day and called my OBGYN’s office as soon as they opened only to be informed that he is not delivering any longer. So I went on the hunt for a new doctor. I knew of several friends that had their babies delivered through a certain office so I left a message for that one. By the end of the day, they still hadn’t called me back yet. I tried calling them again, but it was too late. So Brian and I decided that we should let close family in on it. I called my mom and asked if they’d like to go to dinner with us… and she completely figured it out! I didn’t hint towards a baby or anything and she still knew what it was about! We met her, my dad, and my brother for dinner that night and I had little boxes with toy baby shoes wrapped up in them. Mom immediately burst into tears and the smile never left my dad’s face. (Those of you that know my dad know that he’s a difficult one to get emotion out of so it was very much welcomed.) I called my grandmother next to tell her and told various family members over the next two days. Mom was sworn to secrecy until we announced it, so I know that was killing her. We went out to dinner with Brian’s mom also… and she, too, burst into tears. After that dinner, we were able to announce it. I was able to get an appointment scheduled with the new doctor that following Monday.

Once it “sunk in”, it still wasn’t very real but I couldn’t ignore it either.  Between that point and my appointment with the doctor, I was scared. Correction: terrified. There are so many “what-if’s” that I think I drove myself nuts with it. I hadn’t been to a woman doctor in years, even after I had a known health problem and I was worried something may have returned. I also know many, MANY people that have had miscarriages in their first trimester. That was constantly in the back of my head. It most likely didn’t help that Brian kept telling me about all of the unpleasant things I get to look forward to. (He quit that after he realized he was scaring me half to death.)

I haven’t had every typical pregnancy symptom. I’ve had some crazy nausea and some weird food aversions. No cravings for things I don’t like yet. I can feel the stretching and pulling which is a weird sensation in itself. I don’t have to go to the bathroom a million times a day. And I’m pretty emotional at times. I’ve had one meltdown so far… long story short, I ended up in the bathroom floor lying on the dog’s bed (it’s big and surprisingly comfy) curled up with a pillow. Brian ended up on the floor next to me rubbing my back until I was able to stop the waterworks. I decided to take a bath afterwards and Brian surprised me with some toast and chicken noodle soup then took care of wrestling that night and told me to stay home and rest. Brian is honestly a great pregnancy partner. He deals with my random bouts of crying (I cried yesterday while still managing to laugh and partially eat a chocolate chip cookie – he held me and rubbed my back until I was done) and my sheer exhausted-ness. I get home from work and it’s really hard for me to get the motivation to do much of anything since sleep is the only thing really on my mind.

.... To be continued!!

Update, part 1

I realize I haven’t written a blog in a while. A few months long. But it wasn’t from a lack of inspiration or whatnot, but more of a plain lack of time to sit down and actually write. So now that I have a spare minute (and by “spare”, I mean while sitting at wrestling practice) I’ll catch you up on what’s been going on in my life.

 

My last blog was about the families in Connecticut. That still hits home for me because it can really happen anywhere. It’s happened more since… not to the same scale, but still school shootings nonetheless. Politically, I agree with the gun law restructure that the Democrats are trying to get passed. No, I do not support the ridiculous theory that Democrats are trying to ban all guns. Not only does that completely infringe on the 2^nd amendment, but it’s just not feasible. The only way that would ever work is if every single gun on this planet were located and destroyed along with design plans for them and if every person that physically manufactures guns are “removed”. You’d also have to get every single country on this planet to do the same. So it is physically and ideologically impossible. What I do agree with, however, are the propositions on the table: the need to remove magazines that have a high amount of ammunition, ban on personal ownership on assault weapons, and having background checks on all gun purchases. I have some additions to the proposal too that I wish were included. I think they need to have people available to do background checks BEFORE a gun show and this check has to be cleared before the start of the show and is required to gain entry. I think there needs to be mental evaluations before being able to purchase a gun. Just because someone’s background is clean, doesn’t mean that their mental health is still there. And also, I think there needs to be a limit on how many guns a person can own.

Now, before you start screaming that only people that will go through this are law-abiding citizens and they shouldn’t be punished for following the law. Guess what? I AGREE WITH YOU! You may also argue that criminals are going to break the law anyway, so they’ll still find a way to get a gun. Guess what?? I AGREE WITH YOU!! But just because they’re going to get it one way or another, doesn’t mean that we can’t deter them from easier access. It is all too easy to go to a gun show and buy a gun and go on a shooting rampage as soon as you leave. I read a news article the other day where a man had over 1700 guns confiscated from his house. Apparently he had illegal guns in Canada and they suspected that the guns he had here were also illegal. He was suspected of gun trafficking, tax evasion, among other things. But that aside… there is no reason that is good enough to me to explain why a man needed THAT many guns. That man did NOT need his own personal arsenal, regardless of if they were purchased legally or not. I personally think that is entirely too many. That is just something terrible waiting to happen… one of those criminals that want to get a gun could have their pick from his if they were to figure out a way to break in. Which, if they want in bad enough, they’ll get in… trust me. That man was just inviting trouble.

On another topic, we hosted Christmas dinner for my side of the family on Christmas Day. My brother, sister in law, and baby nephew were able to make it to town to be with everyone. I got to buy a baby toy which I love to do since I hardly get to do it. He rode that car until he was too tired to do it anymore. My mother in law hosted dinner for his side of the family and I got to buy more baby toys (hehe). We had extra family there this year, which was very nice, so they got to play games with us and fill up on food. The food turned out great, as usual. My mother in law even made her really delicious cheesy potatoes that I like so much.

Timothy turned 10… officially double digits. That kid is getting too old too quick. Personally, I would love to put a brick on his head and keep him small forever, but I guess that doesn’t work too well. We managed to get tickets to go see the Harlem Globetrotters and took him (and Thomas) to see them. So now, every time they see a commercial for them, both of the kids yell “HEY! WE GOT TO SEE THEM!” It makes me feel good when we are able to take them to things that they’ve never done before.

Then New Year’s came. We tried our hardest to stay awake, but we all crashed before the ball dropped. Brian managed to wake up during the countdown (at 5, I think) and woke me up real quick. The kids were asleep in Timothy’s room so we couldn’t get to them in time. We had our annual midnight kiss and went in Timothy’s room, told the kids good night, covered them up, and went to bed.

2013 has started out pretty well for us. I hit a personal goal… I ended up losing a total of 63 pounds since last March. I think I did pretty well with it since I needed to “maintain” my weight for two different weddings with a couple months in between and with the holidays and how my family (personal and extended) loves to eat, as I think I’ve mentioned already.

.... To be continued with the BIG NEWS!!!